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Post by williepullit on Jun 2, 2007 18:24:04 GMT 1
A fat ugly bird with two fat ugly kids waddles into Birmingham Tesco.The greeter at the door says"hello madam,are your two children Twins?"she grunts"do they look like f,,kin twins, ??The greeter replies,"no madam i just cant believe somebody has shagged you twice!"  |
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Post by williepullit on Aug 7, 2007 19:51:05 GMT 1
heres one from Fast Eddie
Ralph came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber.
He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said, 'You died in your sleep, Ralph.'
Ralph was stunned. 'I'm dead? No, I can't be! I've got too much to live for. Send me back!'
St. Peter said, 'I'm sorry, but there's only one way you can go back, and that is as a chicken.'
Ralph was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a farm near his home. The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers, clucking, and pecking the ground.
A rooster strolled past. 'So, you're the new hen, huh? How's your first day here?'
'Not bad,' replied Ralph the hen, 'but I have this strange feeling inside. Like I'm gonna explode!'
'You're ovulating,' explained the rooster. 'Don 't tell me you've never laid an egg before?'
'Never,' said Ralph.
'Well, just relax and let it happen,' says the rooster. 'It's no big deal.'
Ralph did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out popped an egg!
Ralph was overcome with emotion as he experienced motherhood. He soon laid another egg -- his joy was overwhelming.
As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on the back of his head, and heard his wife shout.....
'Dammit, Ralph! Wake up. You're shitting in the bed!'
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Fast Eddie
New Member
Intelligence Is Overrated
Posts: 1
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Post by Fast Eddie on Aug 8, 2007 18:42:39 GMT 1
Doesn't this sound like someone that we all know? I'm pretty sure its not Pullit or Tuna. hmmm?  ? |
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